We know that social connection enriches our lives--so why do we hesitate to connect?
"One of those rare books that might actually change your life." --Daniel Gilbert, New York Times bestselling author of Stumbling on Happiness
There is a paradox at the core of human life. We are a highly social species uniquely equipped to connect with other people and doing so is better for us. Yet we so often choose to be unsocial. We avoid talking to the stranger who sits next to us. We struggle to move beyond small talk with an acquaintance. We are reluctant to express our gratitude to people we appreciate. Every day, we avoid opportunities to connect with strangers, neighbors, colleagues, friends, and family. By missing those moments, we miss out on all the benefits of a more social life--one that is happier and healthier for everyone.
University of Chicago psychologist and author of Mindwise, Nicholas Epley has spent his career studying the way we connect, and he has found that our social fears often keep us from reaching out. But Epley shows us how to seize the small moments with insights such as:
- Social connection is a choice we make based on expectations about how others will respond to us--expectations that tend to be overly pessimistic.
- Introverts and extroverts alike benefit from choosing to be a little more social.
- Mistaken expectations can cause us to avoid interacting in ways that create strong connections--such as having a conversation--in favor of less satisfying interactions--such as social media or texting.
- While many books promise one big fix, making a habit of small connections is much more likely to improve your life.
- The habits and practices that Epley advocates are approachable. The beauty of this book is that small acts have an outsized impact on the most important parts of our lives.
Bridging the gap between two people is easier than we think, and success more likely, if we choose to be a little more social.
"Brilliant, eye-opening, and deeply practical, A Little More Social will change how you think about everyday connection. Nick Epley reveals why we so often hold back from the very social connections that would make us happier and healthier--and how tiny, intentional choices can transform our daily lives. A Little More Social is smart, surprising, and brimming with insights about how to reach out, overcome our self-imposed walls, and rediscover the joy of being human." -- Sonja Lyubomirsky, Distinguished Professor of Psychology, University of California, Riverside, and author of The How of Happiness and How to Feel Loved
"In A Little More Social, world-renowned behavioral scientist Nicholas Epley masterfully blends cutting-edge research with unforgettable stories to reveal how small acts of connection can make your life richer and happier. This brilliant, humane, and inspiring book will forever change how you see and reach out to other people." --Katy Milkman, author of How to Change
"With science-backed research, Epley offers fresh insights into the causes of our self-constructed barriers and provides commonsense and applicable ways to break them down." --Booklist
NICHOLAS EPLEY is the John Templeton Keller Professor of Behavioral Science and faculty director of the Roman Family Center for Decision Research at the University of Chicago Booth School of Business. He is the author of Mindwise: Why We Misunderstand What Others Think, Believe, Feel, and Want. He lives with his family in Chicago.